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Louis Tomlinson opened up about grieving Liam Payne on One Direction’s 15th anniversary in a new interview with Rolling Stone U.K.
“Naively, I thought that because at this point, I’m relatively well versed in grief for my age, that it might soften the blow. [That was] super-naive. It’s very different. I’ve never lost a friend before,” Tomlinson said
Payne died at 31 on Oct. 16, 2024 after falling from a hotel balcony in Buenos Aires, Argentina
Louis Tomlinson had a whole lot of history with his late friend Liam Payne.
In a new interview with Rolling Stone U.K., Tomlinson, 33, opened up about the 15th anniversary of One Direction’s formation, and the first without Payne.
“It was really uncomfortable, actually, the 15th anniversary, because the [collective] feeling to celebrate is as important, if not more important than ever, on behalf of Liam,” he told the outlet.
While Tomlinson said he once felt “sick of nostalgia,” this anniversary without Payne was different. “You know, there’s still a level in my head [where it feels] unjust and frustrating that he’s not with us anymore. So, it just brought up those feelings, although I’m still living with them anyway.”
“It was really, really, impossibly difficult for me to deal with losing Liam,” he added.
Tomlinson lost his mother, Johannah Deakin, to leukemia in 2016, and his younger sister Félicité Tomlinson, when she accidentally overdosed in 2019. “Naively, I thought that because at this point, I’m relatively well versed in grief for my age, that it might soften the blow. Super-naive. It’s very different. I’ve never lost a friend before,” Tomlinson said of grief.
JM Enternational/Redferns
One Direction pose at tables during The BRIT Awards 2012 at The O2, on February 21, 2012 in London, England. L-R Niall Horan, Zayn, Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles, Liam Payne.
Tomlinson called Payne the “safest pair of hands” in One Direction. “We were all just so amateur, but he was already where he needed to be by the time he did his first [X Factor] audition,” he said of Liam’s guidance. “None of us would have admitted it at the time, because you have a lot of pride as a young lad, but we all looked up to him like that.”
Payne died at 31 after falling multiple stories from a balcony at the CasaSur Palermo Hotel in Buenos Aires, Argentina on Oct. 16, 2024. An investigation determined his cause of death as “polytrauma,” according to a hearing that took place in December at Buckinghamshire Coroner’s Court, the BBC reported.
According to the National Library of Medicine, polytrauma refers to multiple injuries that involve multiple organs or systems.
Dave J Hogan/Dave J Hogan/Getty
Liam Payne and Louis Tomlinson present an award for Best Female Solo Artist at the BRIT Awards 2016 at The O2 Arena on February 24, 2016 in London, England.
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A toxicology report released in November by the prosecutor’s office said Payne had traces of “alcohol, cocaine and prescription antidepressants” in his system at the time of his death.
Payne is survived by his 8-year-old son Bear Grey, whom the singer shared with his ex, Girls Aloud singer Cheryl Cole.
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