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Conan O\u2019Brien is not a cynic \u2014 at least not when it comes to the Oscars, which he is hosting for the first time on Sunday. The Emmy-winning comedian, podcaster<\/a>, traveler<\/a> and movie buff is genuinely excited \u2014 \u201cI get to do this!\u201d he enthused \u2014 but also thoroughly worried.<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s the thing I wake up and think about at night: What\u2019s the best way to tackle this? How? In a way that makes me creatively happy?\u201d he said.<\/p>\n Since he accepted the job late last year, O\u2019Brien, 61, has had an emotionally taxing few months. In December, his parents, who were in their 90s, died three days apart<\/a>, in his childhood home in Massachusetts. Not long after the double funeral, just as he was settling back in Los Angeles to work on the Oscars, the fires started there, and his home was evacuated. When his wife called to ask what to save, his only thought was of a 1980 letter from the author and essayist E.B. White. O\u2019Brien had written to him<\/a>, as a teenage fan, \u201cand he wrote me back a really sweet letter,\u201d O\u2019Brien said. \u201cSo I said, just grab that. And if the rest goes, it goes.\u201d<\/p>\n He is still living in a hotel, where he has hung the letter on a wall, he said in a video interview from his office on Monday. The conversation was discursive \u2014 pensive and funny. Though he hosted the Emmys twice (most recently in 2006), he has never attended the Oscars. \u201cThis was the only way I could get invited,\u201d he joked.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n His preparation has included bringing in 10 of his own writers to work with Oscar-night stalwarts, running jokes by the crew, and dropping in at clubs in Los Angeles to try out material. \u201cI started seriously writing comedy around the time I was 18,\u201d he said, \u201cand it\u2019s what I think about all the time.\u201d Yet even for him, there is no formula. \u201cIt\u2019s frustrating, but it\u2019s not math. You can\u2019t prove it. The only way to find out is to try it on people.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n Still, with only days to go before the show, O\u2019Brien had few confirmed plans: Would he do a musical number? An opening montage? \u201cNothing\u2019s in stone,\u201d he said. \u201cI\u2019m leaving every possibility on the table. I have choices right now, and we\u2019ll see what happens.\u201d<\/p>\n Given the churning news cycle, the risk of creating until the last minute felt both necessary and worth it. \u201cThere will be things that don\u2019t go the way I want them to go,\u201d he said. \u201cBut stay open to the possibility that that\u2019s a gift, and you can make something out of it.\u201d<\/p>\n Beyond that, he has a secret for staying grounded. \u201cI\u2019m just going to read a lot of very dreary Russian novels,\u201d he said. \u201c\u2018Crime and Punishment\u2019; \u2018Brothers Karamazov\u2019; \u2018Notes From Underground.\u2019 I\u2019m going to finish reading them live onstage \u2014 aloud. This is an Oscars you don\u2019t want to miss!\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n Here are edited excerpts from the conversation.<\/p>\n Hosting this show is tricky \u2014 notoriously kind of a <\/strong>thankless task<\/a><\/strong>, that a lot of people <\/strong>say no to<\/a><\/strong>. Why did you agree?<\/strong><\/p>\n I need the money. And when I say that, keep in mind, it pays very little.<\/p>\n I said yes because I am nostalgic, particularly now, about my childhood. The biggest thrill I\u2019ve had in my career is meeting the celebrities that were on my television when I was a little boy. So when I met Don Knotts<\/a>, I lost my mind. When I met Tom Cruise, I was happy and he was very lovely to me. But it couldn\u2019t have the same impact [as Don Knotts]. And I remember watching Johnny Carson host the Oscars, and that being a big deal.<\/p>\n And I intellectually understand \u2014 the entertainment landscape has changed a lot. I told Billy Crystal: \u201cYou hit a note that I think you can\u2019t hit anymore.\u201d Because when people tuned in to his Oscars, everyone had seen the movies he was parodying. It\u2019s not the communal campfire that it maybe once was.<\/p>\n But I still think the Oscars has meaning. Really good cinema \u2014 especially when it\u2019s from different countries, different points of view \u2014 has an incredible amount of resonance and importance right now, and this is the night that celebrates that. <\/strong>To be a part of it is meaningful to me. I don\u2019t think of it as a thankless task \u2014 even if I just do it once, and no one\u2019s interested in me doing it again, it will have been a meaningful experience for me. My parents aren\u2019t here to see it, but I know it would have been a huge deal to them.<\/p>\n I was able to tell my father, and he was impressed. [Chuckles]. He probably wondered, couldn\u2019t they find someone else?<\/p>\n This has been such an intense few months for you, personally.<\/strong><\/p>\n It\u2019s a lot. And it just might be an Irish Catholic thing, but we\u2019re so good at pushing things down to push forward. It\u2019s a strength and a weakness. My one goal with the Oscars is, I would like to have fun onstage that night. I would like to enjoy it. Because I\u2019m at a stage in my career where I don\u2019t know if one thing leads to another anymore.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n And I\u2019m not saying that in a morbid or sad way. I\u2019m content; I\u2019ve been blessed. I\u2019ve really enjoyed all the things that I\u2019ve been able to make and the crazy adventures I\u2019ve had, the highs and lows. I wouldn\u2019t change a thing, And if I\u2019m having fun, I won\u2019t say everybody else will be having fun \u2014 because that\u2019s not how the internet works \u2014 but if I\u2019m having a good time, I think that will translate.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n Did you get advice from other veteran hosts, like Billy Crystal or Jimmy Kimmel?<\/strong><\/p>\n Billy lost his house<\/a> in the fire, and I didn\u2019t want to bother him because I can only imagine. Then I saw him at the \u201cS.N.L.\u201d 50th, and we had a long talk, so I think I\u2019m going to be texting him to maybe say, \u201chere are some jokes,\u201d things like that.<\/p>\n I got more into the weeds with Jimmy and Molly [Kimmel and McNearney, his head writer\/producer who is also his wife]. We went out to dinner, and they have such an encyclopedic knowledge \u2014 things you wouldn\u2019t even think about. Like, if you\u2019re doing a bit about somebody in Act I, make sure they\u2019re in their seat, because sometimes five minutes into the monologue they\u2019re still loading people in. Jimmy said, just make sure you sit down when you can, in between acts, because you are standing the whole three hours and it does start to wear away at you. So I\u2019ve had a pair of metal legs made that I\u2019m going to paint a flesh color.<\/p>\n You said, <\/strong>on your podcast<\/a><\/strong>, that you hate when critics single out something relatively minor in a movie. What did you love, among the nominees?<\/strong><\/p>\n We live in the era of nit-picking. Making a great film is next to impossible. I think it\u2019s kind of a miracle \u2014 every year I think of the thousands of films that are made and how they\u2019ve been being made for 100 years. And still the truly great, perfect movies are very few and far between. So to me, it\u2019s a celebration of the effort.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n [In \u201cA Complete Unknown\u201d], there is a scene where Timoth\u00e9e Chalamet, as Bob Dylan, is trying to write a song \u2014 you see him struggling. I thought it was a great depiction of the creative process, which is usually misrepresented in film. I was blown away by Mikey Madison in \u201cAnora.\u201d I loved \u201cConclave.\u201d I\u2019d watch Ralph Fiennes read from an electrical manual. I think I\u2019ve seen all the movies and I saw real merit in a lot of them. And then I\u2019ll be quiet about the ones that I wasn\u2019t as crazy about, because who cares?<\/p>\n